Sacrifices…

I’ve had two deaths in two consecutive shifts. Did I do something wrong? or do I have a grave sin that I haven’t asked forgiveness for? Why does someone have to pass away when I’m around? Why does it have to be toxic when I’m on duty?

In my unit, a patient’s death is not unusual, but having the same nurse do the post mortem care is. Post mortem care is the time when a patient is cleared from attached gadgets( ex. Cardiac monitor etc.) and tubes( IV’s. nasogastric tubes etc.) after being pronounced dead by the physician. That’s me alright, yes, two consecutive duties, a post mortem care on each.

I went home with every inch of my muscles sore because I had to do CPR for 15 mins because the doctor hasn’t arrived yet. Well, what can I do, I guess that was what I was called for, a nurse. Nurses do a lot of sacrifices just to save lives remember. Come to think of it, I should be proud of myself . Atleast muscle aches heal, but the act of sacrifice will be imprinted in my heart forever. Now, I have to end this post cause a nurse needs some sleep. Zzzzzz……zzzzz…zz.

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2 Responses to Sacrifices…

  1. JP Sterling says:

    My mother and grandmother were both hospice nurses. I always thought people wanted to be nurses and doctors because they wanted to help people heal. I asked my mom once, “Aren’t there miracles? Don’t sometimes they pull through?” and she said “No. They all die.” I don’t know how they handled that. My mom and grand had thick skin, but found helping people cope with their last days to be reward enough.

    In your case, you can’t blame yourself. If you had called in sick today, those people would still have died. It must be hard when it happens in front of you, but remind yourself of the long-view. We all die. We often show up at a hospital to do it. You can’t make someone else’s death about you, when you did everything you could to prevent it. When it’s time, it’s time.

    Death is a good reminder — to be kind to people, to not wait to love them, and to say what you need to say to them while they’re still breathing.

  2. wonderful article! thanks for sharing your joyous observations!
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    Models From The Earth

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